Date ideas determined by love language

The perfect date night looks very different from one person to the next, but one thing’s for certain, setting aside time for a date with someone special is a great way to get to know someone new or nurture a long term relationship. Whether it’s about reconnecting, trying something new or making lasting memories, there are endless ways you can spend time together. So, where do you start when it comes to planning the perfect date?


Dates designed with love language(s) in mind

Understanding your partner's love language, and your own, is a great place to start when planning a date. If you’re not familiar with each of the love languages, see our blog to learn more (and discover what yours is). The concept proposes that the way in which everyone expresses and desires love can fall into one or more of the five categories: words of affirmation, acts of service, quality time, physical touch and receiving gifts. Understanding how you and your partner prefer to experience or “receive” love (and then putting this newfound knowledge into practice) can help you connect on a deeper level, which is why we’ve rounded up date ideas centred around each language.

If their love language is: Quality time

  • Take part in their hobby: The early days of dating with all that new relationship energy feels exciting as you’re still discovering one another. The good news is that learning doesn’t have to end once courtship does. Join your partner in their hobby (gardening, camping or yoga, for instance) and not only will they appreciate your company, but you’ll be surprised by how much you learn about them by immersing yourself in their world. 

  • Take your date outdoors: Some of the best dates aren’t about doing anything at all, they’re centred around simply being. Something as simple as spending time in nature — at the beach, in the bush, or stargazing at the night sky can be an incredibly romantic experience. The purpose is to dedicate time that belongs entirely to the two of you, free from the distractions of technology and to-do lists. 

If their love language is: Physical touch

  • Try a couples massage: A great way to relax together is by unwinding with a blissful, professional treatment. Physical touch in the form of massage brings multi-dimensional benefits to our body, mind and spirit and sharing the experience together introduces a little novelty into your relationship. Contact your local endota spa to see whether they offer couples treatments.

  • Go to an outdoor cinema: A simple upgrade to your usual Netflix-and-chill routine gives you a chance to get cuddly in a cosy setting. Bring blankets, cushions and snacks and enjoy the comfort of physical closeness, with feel-good chemicals such as dopamine and oxytocin (known as the bonding hormone) released each time you touch.

If their love language is: Acts of service

  • Make their favourite meal: There’s a reason why the dinner date has endured through the ages. Tenderly preparing a meal for someone you love is a means of communicating on an emotional level how much you care for them, with food having the ability to be nourishing, nostalgic and sensual all at once. Visit endota Retreat for recipe inspiration and create a private, candle-lit dining experience at home.

  • Do that thing they’ve been meaning to: Is there something your other half has been putting off doing? Whether it’s a DIY project, fixing something around the house or a time-consuming errand, suggest doing it together. While it doesn’t sound like the most romantic date idea, it can lead to an increased sense of intimacy between you — showing that you pay attention to the small things and you’re there for them to lean on.
If their love language is: Words of affirmation

  • See live music: Music brings people together, having the power to communicate things we can’t always articulate with words alone. If you’re not a very expressive person, take your date to see a live band or artist and let the rhythm and lyrics do the talking. Alternatively, plan a relaxing night in and create a playlist for them, specifically choosing songs that describe how you feel towards them, making sure to include “your” song. 

  • Leave love notes: Set up a scavenger-hunt-style date with love notes that say something special about your partner with each clue they find. The location of the notes could be places you’ve been together before (triggering nostalgic and heartfelt memories), or places that are meaningful to you which you want to share with them.

If their love language is: Giving and receiving gifts

  • Surprise them with tickets somewhere: When it comes to gift-centric date ideas, the point is to choose something thoughtful that you can enjoy together, like tickets to a festival, exhibition, comedy show or even to your local cinema. Making the effort to book something in advance tells them that you’re thinking of them, and the chosen activity reaffirms how well you know them. 

  • The ceremony of self-care: The true meaning of gift giving is about sentiment rather than extravagance. However small, it reminds your other half that they’re loved. Giving the gift of self-care (think: a beautifully curated skincare pack) shows that you’re committed to their wellbeing and gives you the tools to set the scene at home with a DIY spa night.

Love languages aren’t just exclusive to romantic love, they extend to familial and self-love too. For ideas on how to inspire more self-love into your everyday, see our blog here.